I must admit that I haven't followed the presidential election too closely.
I must admit that I haven’t followed the presidential election too closely. For me, it’s just too early to get all worked up about which candidate said what about whom.
After all, I’ve got fishing to do. It’s officially fall now, and this is the hot time for fishing along our coast.
I had the chance to do some fishing over the weekend at Cape Lookout with my brothers. We caught a few keepers — you know, those types of fish that meet all the minimum weight and length requirements that allow you to put it in the cooler and then eat it for dinner.
That got me thinking: What we need is to have a keeper system for all these presidential candidates. After all, we know that there are more than a few who we just want to throw back into the ocean.
My suggestion is to get one of these Bill Dance-type fishing shows as we continue into the election season. The basic premise of all these fishing shows is to teach people how to successfully catch a keeper. Most of the times on these shows, the host will catch a fish, kiss it and throw it back into the water. Personally, I can’t see myself kissing a candidate like Bernie Sanders, even if I had planned on throwing him back.
I’m not terribly high on Sanders. I appreciate that he’s in the ocean, but in the end I think he’s just going to end up getting eaten by Hillary Clinton. In that sense, I guess Sanders would make good bait.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not necessarily saying Clinton is a keeper. She may emerge from the depths to become the Democratic nominee, but in the end, I’m thinking she’s going to be like those fish that are fun to catch but still don’t quite measure up and must be thrown back.
There’s a whole big school of Republican candidates. They are in the middle of making a big splash in the ocean, and they are getting the attention of everyone who has a fishing rod in their hands. A lot of people are trying to catch just one, but it’s not easy.
Scott Walker was apparently one of the weaker fish in the school. He fell behind and could never catch up. Now he’s swimming aimlessly without any sort of direction.
Donald Trump is the shark of the bunch. He’s at the top of the food chain currently and is willing to attack all the other fish — and even some swimmers — in the ocean. One thing about a shark though: If you catch one, you generally don’t want anything to do with it.
You may get a hook into Jeb Bush. He’s been known to take the bait every now and again. He may be the one fish out in the ocean that stands a chance against a shark.
Of course, after having kept a couple of Bushes already, you can’t help but wonder if it’s worth keeping another one.
Some people think Ben Carson is the prettiest fish in the ocean and well worth keeping. Others disagree and say he leaves a bad taste in their mouths.
As the saying goes, there’s more than one fish in the sea. In the end, we’re going to have to keep one. Bill Dance, we’re going to need some help.
Ken Buday is the editor and general manager of the Havelock News. He can be reached at 444-1999 or at firstname.lastname@example.org.